Birth control

Last night in our church small group, somehow (don’t ask) the topic of family planning came up. One of the couples said, “our friends got pregnant using “natural family planning” and the doctor said, “do you know what we call couples who use that method? PARENTS.”

Everyone laughed.

But it bugged me.

I feel fairly strongly about the following:

a) Everyone should be able to do their own research about how to have safe sex and/or avoid/plan to get pregnant.

b) Women who want to take the Pill should be able to take the Pill. Those who do not want to take the Pill SHOULD NOT HAVE TO TAKE THE PILL.

c) Aside from the Pill – taken here to mean an estrogen-containing oral contraceptive – there are other family planning methods available that are effective (or not effective) for family planning. These include the following:

1) Progesterone-only Pill – aka the “minipill”, or “POP”. Does not contain estrogen. Very prone to failure, as it is a tiny dose of progesterone that must be taken at the *exact* time every day. (Estrogen pills should be taken at the exact time every day, but they are *slightly* more forgiving of slight discrepancies in the time one takes them.)

2) IUDs. There is the copper IUD and the Mirena IUD. The copper IUD has no hormones. The Mirena IUD has progesterone which is released “locally” (although really, everything *does* circulate, but it is said to release a very very low concentration of progesterone). Both are extremely effective. The copper IUD tends not to affect periods/blood flow and the Mirena IUD tends to lighten or eliminate periods.

Once they are removed, they convey no protection against pregnancy.

I had a Mirena for almost 2 years. It was good. It stopped my periods, which was the goal. Unlike a lot of women who have it, I really had no other side effects and I thought it was fine.

3) Barrier methods: condoms, female condoms, diaphragms, cervical caps. All of which have varying rates of efficacy (the diaphragm and cervical cap being among the worst because they can slip, and the woman has no idea that it has slipped, followed closely by the female condom). (I don’t know why the female condom sucks. I’ve never used one, and they are very expensive compared to male condoms. According to this article, they are difficult to place, which probably means they aren’t used properly in practice.)

The male and female condoms are the only birth control methods that can protect against sexually transmitted diseases.

4) Abstinence. I love how this is mentioned in every birth control efficacy chart. Of COURSE this is 100% effective…until it is no longer the game plan. Remember that line from Anchorman? “They’ve done studies, you know. 60% of the time, it works all the time.”

Ha. I crack myself up.

5) Other hormone-containing things, like the Patch or the Ring.

I tried the Ring. I hated it. It fell out constantly. But it has its enthusiastic fans, too.

6) More hormone-containing things, like the Shot (Depo-Provera). Has only progesterone, given by injection every three months.

This freaks me out because it is something circulating in the body for 3 months. What if you hate it? You can’t clear it out of your system, and you have to wait for 3 months! However, it is a good option for people who can’t remember to take the Pill, or people who can’t take estrogen.

7) Natural family planning methods. AKA: Non-hormonal, non-invasive methods.

And here we get on a soap box.

The options:

1. The pull-out-and-pray method (aka coitus interruptus). Does this require further explanation? Issue: Sometimes there are spermies in the pre-ejaculate. The part that escapes prior to the guy knowing to pull out.

2. Rhythm/calendar method: Where a woman starts counting her cycle days from the first day of menstruation, to day 14, when she assumes she ovulates, avoids around that time, and assumes she is safe the rest of the month.

This just doesn’t make sense.  All women are different.  Their cycle lengths are different, their bodies are different, and very few women actually ovulate on the 14th day of their not-likely-to-be-28-day cycle.

3. Natural family planning (NFP)/Fertility Awareness Method (FAM). (Yes, I am lumping the two together for purposes of this post. I’m sorry to anyone I offend.) Differentiated by the fact that FAM users employ backup methods, like condoms, during fertile phases of the woman’s cycle. NFP traditionally employs abstinence during these times.

Birth control method charts make this method of family planning look foolish, which only contributes to the types of jokes circulating in doctor’s offices. The number of health-care professionals I have had to explain this method to is appalling…friends of mine who use the calendar method, the pull-and-pray method, who think that we are insane for planning the way we did for the time that we did it. So here I go: my plug.

It is my opinion that every woman on this planet should have access to this information.

It is NOT my opinion that every woman/couple on this planet should employ this method of birth control for a billion reasons:

1) It takes planning, awareness, preparation, and, at times, restraint. The fertile phases of a women’s cycle also tend to be the most sexually arousing. Couples prone to spontaneous unprotected sex would be very, very poor matches for this method of birth control.

2) It requires that the woman read a lengthy book and understand what is going on in her body.

3) It requires that the woman consistently check her temperature and interact with her body in ways that may be uncomfortable for her.

4) It requires that the couple be on the same page in terms of protecting/avoiding during fertile periods (if avoiding). This is *not* always the case in many relationships. It is the sad reality that many sexual relationships are not characterized by negotiation, understanding, and love, and in those relationships, where the woman cannot guarantee that she will always be able to avoid/protect during fertile periods, this method is not appropriate.

That being said, this method is extremely effective when used appropriately and correctly.

It takes into account temperature charting (basal body temperature – temperature first thing in the morning), cervical mucus, and cervical position. Those three signs, combined with a commitment to using condoms or abstaining during the fertile period, constitute a form of birth control that is more effective than almost any other method (other than abstinence entirely, IUDs, or permanent sterilization).

We used this method exclusively for two years of avoiding. We didn’t get pregnant during those two years, but I wasn’t sure if it was because I was infertile or because the method was effective. (Then I had the Mirena IUD placed to reduce my menstrual flow because I was getting too anemic.) When we started trying, we achieved pregnancy on the first full cycle of trying.

That is not to say that everyone using this method will find that it works well when TTC. But it *will* help a woman determine the length of her luteal phase (a critical factor in a successful pregnancy), whether she is ovulating, or whether there might be some other underlying factor in the inability to conceive. It will help a fertility specialist in trying to help a couple who seek to become pregnant.

I will also say that DB and I practice this method in the *most* conservative way: we use a condom/avoid on the days that I know I am fertile and/or THINK that I MIGHT be fertile. I think this has contributed to our success for those two years and again in the last 4 months, when avoiding pregnancy has been critical (due to the type of pregnancy loss we had).

This book changed our (my husband and I) lives for the better:

And apparently, 1000 women agree with me (see reviews for the book on Amazon!).

It is long, and it is comprehensive, but it is absolutely the best book on women’s bodies, fertility, and practicing reliable birth control without pills or implants or medical intervention. It is also a great book for learning about conception. I cannot recommend this book highly enough. I believe that *everyone* should have a copy, even if the Pill is the best option for them.

So here is my point:

If you look at that article I linked to, above, and look at the efficacy rates of any of these methods, they all seem scary, with the exception of the permanent/fixture-type (IUD) methods.

However, this method is different in that its efficacy rate is based upon reading natural signs/symptoms of the body, understanding them, and acting accordingly. Which means that efficacy rates will take into account all of the issues noted above (women unable/unwilling to chart effectively, unable to negotiate terms with partner, unable to abstain/protect at fertile times).

Which means that the data – as is the data with almost any BC method (ie, the columns for “perfect” versus “typical” use) is skewed. Couples using a condom every time but the one time she is fertile screw up the statistics. Couples who are on the Pill except for the two days she forgets it screw up the statistics.

In short, they are all prone to failure. And they are all prone to not-failure. It depends on the user’s level of commitment to the method.

And, a word on God and His will for people getting pregnant:

We all know of the couple that got pregnant using this method. Our friends did. Our friends friends did. No question, it happens.

But if you ask them, honestly, if they knew the possibility existed when they conceived that child? I would guess that the vast majority would say yes (although you’d have to be a close friend to ask!!) Our friends said that they were pretty sure they wanted a child, and they just “kind of stopped paying attention”.

OF COURSE one runs the risk of getting pregnant with this method if they “stop paying attention”!

And this also means – if you get pregnant, it is not because “God wanted you to have a baby!” No. With the number of infertile couples out there, I do not believe that God has any personal desire for one couple to easily get pregnant and another couple to struggle for years. I’ve talked about this (probably ad nauseum) before.

No, God created women’s bodies to be able to carry a child and God created men’s bodies to be able to father a child. But God wants us to be smart about what we know, too. Getting pregnant because the couple was not paying attention is not necessarily God’s will for their family’s growth. That is people having sex at the appropriate point in the woman’s cycle, resulting in a fertilization event that will ultimately become a baby.

But can we say that it is God’s will that adoptive mothers relinquish their child? That it is God’s will that a child suffer abuse, or trauma, the family they were born into? That it is God’s will that a pregnancy ends tragically in a loss?

NO.

Stepping off of soapbox now…

There is so very much wrong with this world

One of the blogs I lurk on read has a post about this horrific organization, the Westboro Baptist Church, which has a theology that is, in summary, stomach-wrenching and unthinkable, with abhorrent practices to match.

They are protesting in NYC today – at a synagogue – and will be in your neighborhood soon, too, and the synagogue where they are hatemongering is launching a campaign to raise money for the causes that are apparently worthy of such hatred.

Please, consider contributing to this effort. Reading their (the hate-monger) website is sickening.

If you cannot contribute, please pray. Our God is one of grace, love, righteous anger, and righteous judgement, but it is His prerogative, not ours, to deign what is abhorrent and not. Certainly the protests here – with signs like, “God hates you”, “God hates the USA”, and others that pronounce who, not what, the Lord “hates” – are not only horrifying, but not Biblical. In the slightest.

God is sovereign. Full stop. Period. And any attempt we make to usurp that is simply an abomination.

Alive (and coming up short)

I guess it’s been a while since I’ve written here.

I don’t have a lot of words these days.

I’m studying for the MCAT, now, since I did well enough in bio and physics to justify continuing on this quest.  I have a lot of studying to do.  It seems that my head *still* resembles a sieve, and whatever physics I learned a few short months ago has left my brain.

Argh.

We are in the process of ditching cable and setting up DVR in another way, using either TiVo or a computer-based DVR and HD-TV over the air.  I realize many people do this already, and we are late to the game, and I also realize that many people think we’re insane for doing this.  It’s been quite a bone of contention between DB and I how to proceed, for reasons I don’t entirely understand…anyway, has anyone done this?  The ditching cable, setting-up-some-other-DVR-thing-using-an-antenna, I mean?  Any thoughts or suggestions?

Otherwise, life is in a weird, sort of apathetic holding pattern.  In rare form, I have almost nothing to say.

How are you all doing?

Important fundraiser (& giveaway)

Listen up!

Heather is an adoptive mom who is trying to raise $1750 to build a home for a family in Vietnam.  She has been trying to raise this money for a long time, and her deadline is the end of May (which is COMING UP) and she still needs people to donate.

She is also giving away a double stroller in exchange for a $10 donation.  Not many people have donated so far, so the chance of actually winning the stroller is HUGE. HOWEVER, if you do not want to win the stroller, you can still donate without entering the giveaway.  I am ashamed to admit that I did not donate until recently because I did not want to win the stroller!  I know, that’s pathetic, especially because we *have* seen desperate poverty and *have* felt called to help in some way.

BUT!  It’s better late than never.  So just go to Heather’s blog and donate!

Anyway, from Kelly’s blog, because she explains it better and Laura already copied her, and although I don’t have many readers, they are, for the most part, different readers because you aren’t adoptive parents, so please think about contributing to Heather’s efforts:

From Kelly’s Blog:

For the past month or so, I’ve seen a fellow adoptive mom Heather trying to raise $1750 to build a home for a family in need in Vietnam through the group Giving It Back to Kids.   Her deadline is the end of this month and she is still not half-way to her goal, yet.

Unless you have been exposed to families in extreme poverty, unless you have seen how many live in third world countries, it is hard to understand the term “shack.”  A “shack” here in our country is not a “shack” in my son’s homeland.  A shack there is a 5 foot by 5 foot area built out of scrap that could house a family with several kids.

Imagine what we could do if everyone gave $10 to Heather’s project?  Even if ten of you do that, and then post this on your blogs, and then ten of your readers do the same, and on and on, we can get her to her goal.

If you have a blog, won’t you help us get the word out?  If you have food on your table, won’t you consider contributing $10 or $20 to a family who you will never meet, but whose world will be forever transformed by your generosity?

It may seem that a few people giving a few dollars can never make a difference, but that is just not true.  If you put a bucket under a dripping faucet, it may seem like it would never fill, but leave the bucket for a few days and that bucket will overflow with countless “insignificant” drops.

Go to Heather’s Blog and CHIP IN!

The morning after.

Blech.

I really have no words to describe how it feels to be done with school for potentially forever.  I mean REALLY potentially forever.  Especially when it’s ALWAYS been over my head – for my entire life – now, it’s just…I’m underemployed.  And a well-oiled science-class study machine at this point, which is so out of character that even D is impressed.

Honestly, I have never EVER studied with the intensity that I studied over the last 2 months…EVER.

I’m not really a study-er.  Let’s just say it wasn’t necessary.  I managed, and it worked out, probably because I write decent papers (some might actually say they are more than decent, but there have been some not-decent ones in there, too, started the night before they are due, written with bursts of clarity and “brilliance” at 4 am, and turned in at 9 am with absolutely. no. editing. what.so.ever….I can admit it, those really were not-so-decent) (although unfortunately, I never suffered, grade-wise, for that behavior, which would be the reason that it never actually stopped) (until the last 2 months, when it finally dawned on me that paper-writing really wasn’t the desired skill in biology or physics) – anyway, all of this to say that I am not used to studying.  At all.

(Those previous posts about studying?  Which you can find if you look hard enough?  Yeah, I mean, I did do that for points in time, but it was always a) late at night, and b) a day late, a dollar short…like in o-chem last summer.  So I guess yes, I did study, but not really in the effective way that one really *should* study.) (And I blogged a lot.  And took a lot of internet/walk the dog/talk on the phone/look at Facebook/eat some food/stand on my head breaks.)

And, in the last 2 months of my completely convoluted education path, I figured it out.  It only took….well, I’m 30, and I’ve been in school for most of the last billion years, so….that’s how long it took.

(I am starting MCAT studying next week.)

(I think those study habits of the last 2 months will probably come in handy for that.)

(Because have I mentioned how much I *suck* at science?!?  In hard science, you have a *right* answer and a *wrong* answer.  I INEVITABLY pick the WRONG answer.  And try very hard, with my lovely skills of Logic and Reason and Writing Prowess – that worked so well in previous courses – to explain why, after 4000 years of Conclusive Evidence-Based Research, that, really, it is This Answer that is ACTUALLY the right one.  Scientists have just not really understood anything all these years.  That, really, *they* should be grateful to *me* for FINALLY enlightening them.)

(It hasn’t worked.  Although in social science, where there are almost *no* Right Answers, or, at least, there are Some Right Answers, and Some Wrong Answers, and really, you could make a good case for any of them, and as long as it’s backed up by Someone’s Research, preferably published in a Peer-Reviewed Journal, it is totally fine.)

(Can we see why, perhaps, there was a taking-hard-science-classes learning curve?)

Going out with a bang, I did take the opportunity to write some love notes on my exam last night, mostly as a way to kind of pull it all (as in, all of these years) together.  Sample question:

A woman owns some sheep, and she loves them very much until they are 2 years old, when she ships them off to become food.  However, sometimes the neighbor’s mangy dogs come and eat the little lambs.  They never eat the big sheep, though.  Which survivorship curve best describes this population of sheep?

Now, the whole question of survivorship curves really depends on whether there is a sizeable population of sheep that can make to adulthood – ie, live a long, (prosperous?) life, and then croak.

But I sat there in the damn exam, wondering, “How old are sheep when they are technically adults?  Does it happen at 2?”

(And then, if you really want to know, I thought, “Well, Little is an adult at 2.  But oh, LITTLE!  Would we kill you for mutton chops?  Oh, that would be so sad.  I would not consider Little to be an adult, but I am pretty sure that is the standard for big dogs…isn’t it?  He still acts like a puppy now, and he’s four.  He still scampers!  But for cats – I think that is a year, to be an adult cat, isn’t it?  I wish I’d paid attention to the sheep at the petting zoo.  I wonder if that said when they are adults….” and on.  I’m sure you get the picture.)

So I wrote a little note.  “My answer is D, but if sheep aren’t at maturity at 2, my answer is B.“

There were SEVERAL instances in this exam when I wrote such notes.  And, at one point, when discussing adrenal insufficiency – a topic I know a little too well, mostly because I am not the world’s most adherent patient, so I’ve taken it upon myself to be well-versed in what happens if one suddenly *stops* taking prednisone or whatever – which was REALLY not the question, but honestly, this man writes really *confusing* questions, and adrenal insufficiency was a *perfect* answer to his question, although it was not based on anything in any lecture or book – ANYWHOO, I wrote,

“Although I actually know this is correct, if this is not what you are looking for, please give me points for creativity.  Thanks!”

Which, you know, is right up there with Logic and Reason.

It’s over.

Phew.

NEGATIVE!

I just found out that my body is clear of hCG (pregnancy hormone) – finally, or already, depending on how you look at it.  It took 10 weeks from the D&C.

This is Very Exciting News, because it means my body was able to expel the trophoblastic material (what was part of the placenta) on its own.  There are molar pregnancies in which this does not happen, and those women need to have chemo.

After this point, for anyone who is curious, I need two more weekly tests that are negative, 3 more monthly tests, and then we are free to try to conceive, if we decide to do that.

Thanks for your prayers – this has not been a fun process at. all.

P.S.  I will publish the update to the toddler/3-year old post soon.  In the middle of finals now…but I haven’t forgotten.

Cheers!

Do you have pig flu?

I have a lot to say about 2009 H1N1 virus. I call it “pig flu”.  Because I’m funny really original like that.  Hee hee.

However, I thought the best thing would just be to post this link.  Go ahead, click it:

Do I Have Swine Flu?

That way, you can decide whether to go to work/take an airplane/sit in class/stay in a home-cave with a mask for emergency grocery store trips.

In all honesty, I do hope and pray that this flu is not a repeat of 1918.  In my (fairly worthless) opinion, I do believe it is a bit overblown at this point, and I hope I am right.  I *do* think that, should it spread to high-density areas of the world that are completely ill-equipped to deal with a virus, it might be devastating.  But so far, given the slow spread of cases (and the very low death rate – 0% in this country, discounting the toddler in Texas who died after being brought to Brownsville from Mexico), I am dubious.

I feel very terrible for the pig farmers in Egypt.  I think that is one of the most tragic stories of this flu.  What a senseless loss.

“Serious debt”

OK, very quickly -

is it me, or is this phrase being thrown around a WHOLE LOT these days?!?

I am mildly obsessed with the Craigslist killer story.  I will admit: I rarely get super obsessed with a news story, but when I do, man, I. AM. OBSESSED.

And the latest news from the CK is that the guy was in “serious debt” (Anderson Cooper, CNN) with “$130K” in student loan debt.

Which is why he stole $800 from a prostitute?  (Or three?)

Um, the math really doesn’t add up.

A)  All psychology aside (and all psychology would suggest that the guy stole money in order to have some power and control and exercise dominion over these women), um, $800?  Is not going to get him very far on that debt.  Really?  It isn’t going to do anything other than terrorize a woman and MAYBE get him some playing time at the casino.

B)  $130K is a lot of money, yes, but it isn’t RARE, is it?

We have…well, we have a lot of student loan debt.  A LOT.  So much so that $130K doesn’t really make me blink.  Almost all of our friends have debt loads in that category (between 70 – 150K…+).  I’m not saying that is a great thing, but it is the reality of higher education….isn’t it?  Tuition is roughly $50K/year for many graduate programs and private undergraduate institutions.  DB and I have three graduate degrees between us.  We have gotten some financial aid, but…

Let’s just say that $130K isn’t out of line, and it is the nonstory here.   And I wouldn’t call it “serious debt”, no matter how much it resembles a mortgage in the midwest.

The other day, when Obama was announcing his plan for restructuring the student loan program, CNN decided to put on a student who was “buried” under student loan debt (to give her personal experience, I guess).

Her debt load?

$15,000.

I mean, seriously?  Is CNN completely in denial about the reality of student loans today?!?

(Because I would be freaking REJOICING if our – or even MY PERSONAL – student debt load was $15K.)

(Just saying.)

New series: My toddler…

The other night, we went to a barbeque with D’s coworkers.  One of his colleagues has two kids, and they were there, too.  One is roughly 13 months and the other is roughly 3.  (I didn’t ask for specific ages but the mom was talking about potty training, and how they would be probably trained at the same time, at 4 and 2…so it isn’t a bad guess for the ages.)

I will say that I *used to* evaluate kids ALL. THE. TIME.  Because for my job, I was evaluating kids ALL. THE. TIME., and giving these kids diagnoses that they would potentially carry with them for the rest of their lives, and *my* role in the evaluation was to ask their parents a bunch of questions and observe the kids in their home environments.  But?  The kids were all pretty much scoped out for me.  This was for a research project, and the kids were referred by their EI (early intervention) providers for some concerning symptoms, and we had done the M-CHAT (Modified Checklist for Autism in Toddlers) on the phone with the mom, and *sometimes* we had even done the ADOS (Autism Diagnostic Observation Schedule) with the child in our lab, so I had a good sense of what the kid was doing EVEN BEFORE I was in the family’s home.

So I spent a lot of my time with “typical” toddlers (or those who did not carry a diagnosis of an ASD) observing them, too.  Because I can describe what “initiating joint attention” is – in layperson’s terms – with the best of them, but to see it?  Is something entirely different.

And I am slightly embarrassed to say that I would sometimes diagnose our friend’s child with an ASD, and those children appear (now, a few years later) to be completely normal.

OK, that happened once.  Just once.  And there were many more kids that we met that I decided were normal and, lo! – they were.

(For the record, I *NEVER* shared my opinions with other parents unless I was specifically and directly asked.)

So ANYhow, I stopped this practice probably 2 years ago, mostly because I got a decent sense of typical toddler behavior all on my own, PLUS I started evaluating teenagers and adults, and the bulk of my clinical experience to that point had been with teenagers…so it became less necessary.

I say all of that because it kind of explains my new post series, called, “My toddler…”

This weekend, we met these two kids, and the three-year old (a boy) was just kind of hanging out by himself, being cute, whatever.  I honestly didn’t pay much attention to him at first.  D and I got some food, put it on plates, and walked out to the balcony where other people were hanging out.  Little Guy came out, plopped himself next to me, and, without LOOKING up at me or saying a word, reached over to my plate, dragged it over in front of himself, and proceeded to eat my grilled corn on the cob.

Which was, frankly, hilarious.  I just got up and got another piece of corn.

Then there was a cordless phone in the middle of the table.  He reached out to the phone and started messing with the buttons.  I decided that was probably not the best idea (his parents were inside, and the rest of the table was totally not paying attention to him), and redirected him by asking him if *I* could see the phone.  I reached out my hands.  Again without making any eye contact, he handed the phone over, and then proceeded to take his (my?) corn, go over to the grill on the balcony, and try to stick his corn in the grill by saying, “Hot.”  “Hot.”

Which we interpreted to mean, “I would like this corn hot”.

(The grill was off by that point, for those of you wondering about child abuse and neglect here…)

So one thing, that I am not going to ask about because I *KNOW* without asking, is that this child’s expressive language is delayed.  VERY delayed.  Two-word phrases, all prompted (some less prompted than others, but the unprompted, spontaneous language was all comprised of single words), and very few of the phrases included a subject, like, “Corn hot”, or “I go in”, etc.  So let’s leave the language alone, because it is clearly an issue.

However, here are the things that I would normally pick up as a concern:

1)  The taking food without looking up at me and making eye contact.  Yes, it was funny.  But do three-year-olds typically make eye contact when taking something?  The food was certainly far enough from him that he PROBABLY did not think it was his, but the way he grabbed it…well, he probably did know it wasn’t his.  In fact, later in the evening, he proceeded to grab food off my plate again (I really don’t care about that), and his mom was sitting next to him, scolded him, and he looked up at me again, as if to ask if he could take the raspberry…which says to me that he knows how to ask permission.

(Nonverbal kids can still “ask permission” to take things, by using joint attention and eye contact.)

So…does your kid make eye contact when grabbing something from someone else?  A stranger?  A familiar face?  A parent?

2)  Eye contact, round two:  if someone asks your child to hand them something, does s/he make eye contact with the individual asking for the object?

3)  Tantrums:  if your child likes an object, and is playing with the object, and a stranger asks him to hand it over (in a happy, fun voice), how would he respond?

4)  Playing with the grill:  this is a two-part question:

a)  Does your three-year old know that something is “hot”, and should not be touched?

b)  Does your three-year old try to mimic you, by putting things in the grill (or on the stove)?

5)  When saying goodbye, does your three-year old:

a)  wave upon mom/dad saying, “Say bye-bye”, or in response to others waving to him/her

b)  Wave on his own, because he knows he’s leaving, and that’s what you do when you’re leaving

c) not wave.

I will post the description of what *I* might be looking for in an evaluation of a toddler (either typical or with suspected ASD) in my next post.  I’m really curious to know whether I am too harsh in my interviews (maybe?  Although I follow the algorithm of the interview VERY tightly) and whether my image of a “typical” toddler is, in fact, “typical”.

So…what does your (2-4 year old) kid do?  (**Don’t worry, these questions comprise only a *TINY* proportion of what I ask about, so even if your answers are, “never looks at anyone, doesn’t wave, and plays with fire”, I will not think any differently of your child.)

Thanks for your responses!

Fast blocks and slow blocks

So…the end of the weekend.  I spent almost every moment of it studying or sleeping.  It wasn’t all that fun.

Tonight there was a review session for the bio exam.  I usually hate it when people say things like this, but I am going to say it – this test is on what seems to be an insane amount of material.  It is covering big topics, in a *lot* of detail, and some of the topics have absolutely NOTHING to do with each other.  See:  immune system, and hormones (ok, those are similar enough), and kidneys and not being cold or hot (ok, those are close enough), and…evolution.  (Huh?) And then back to…embryos.  Specifically, like, fertilization and the first oh, say, 10 cell divisions of an embryo (zygote).  In humans, birds, frogs, and…sea urchins.  Yeah, sea urchins.  So vitally important to know how *they* start out.

But in any case, so we get to learn about sperm and eggs and how they find each other and set up shop.  Great.  Well, one of the (many) things we need to know about is what is called the “fast block” to polyspermy (mulitple sperm going into the egg) (ie, preventing that from happening) and the “slow block” to polyspermy.  The fast block is something that sea urchins have, because their eggs are floating everywhere and surrounded by sperm everywhere and they need to be sure to only have one sperm get in that egg, right?  And the slow block is something that *everyone* – mammals, sea urchins, frogs, you, me…has.  (The fast block happens…faster…than the slow block.  As the name might imply.)

See where I’m going with this?

So I have learned all of the blocking polyspermy stuff.  I feel rather up-to-speed on these things, if only because hey – it is relevant to me (see previous post re: toaster magic, and peeing), and it was interesting.  It came up today in the review.

Volunteer former student running the review session: “So the fast block is… and the slow block is… and they are in all animals”.

Dude in the class:  “Wait, I thought the fast block wasn’t in mammals?”

Volunteer dude running session: “It isn’t? [Fumble.]  Hmm…”

Another dude in the class:  “So few sperm get to the mammal egg that they don’t NEED the fast block…by the time you need to block the sperm, the slow block is in place.”

(Me…thinking about how I WISHED mammals had a fast block and a slow block.)

(Some ensuing discussion about whether mammals had fast blocks or not, and why polyspermy is a Bad Thing.)

Someone in the room: “Because what a MESS it would be if there were more than one sperm in the egg!!”

Everyone…laughs.  All I was thinking was, “It’s not that funny when it actually happens…”  I was just short of breaking down, thinking about what a MESS our kid was.

A mess.

Yes, that’s exactly how I think of him.  A mess.

Anyway, part of me thinks I am being too sensitive.  (A big part.)  But the other part?  Wishes that mammals really DID evolve with both the fast block and slow block, because then I bet we wouldn’t have had the eager-beaver sperm problem.  Damn sperm.

Damn ineffective slow block.

And…back to studying.  Some more.

My magic toaster

I am really, really committed to studying, so I have not been online at all recently.  It is amazing how a little lot of fear of failure will inspire such…behavior change.

Yes, I, Rachel, am now studying roughly 10-15 hours a day.  No joke.  No breaks.  Although I have noticed there is a diminishing return around the 10-11 hour mark.

(That should give you some idea of how far behind I am…the fact that that level of studying is necessary.)

Anyway, Jena is running a giveaway on her new blog Cute…Covered.  It is the second post down.  The blog is about being fashionable and modestly dressed, and she has some really great thoughts.  I just tried to characterize those thoughts and I totally failed, so I would encourage anyone who is interested to go check it out!!

As an aside, her blog is pretty much perfect for me, since I am very modest and have absolutely no sense of style.  In any way.  See, exhibit A:  sweatpants and torn alma mater sweatshirt.  See also:  $8 jeans and turtleneck sweaters in every color and for every season.  Yup.  (I only partly jest.)

So I have learned a lot from her already .  Go enter!

Back to…today, bio, and then tonight, physics.  Mostly because physics is a lost cause.  Mostly because…well, you know how you plug in a toaster?  Into that socket in the wall?  Yeah, so I have been plugging in toasters for most of my life, and not really thinking for more than 2.2 seconds about how it is that the toaster works.  It is JUST MAGIC.  POOF.  And it turns out, it really would have behooved me to actually think about what the hell happens behind the three holes that miraculously give life to my toaster.

Or to the hair dryer.

Or the alarm clock.

Or any other electrical object.  It turns out that the area of my ignorance is vast, and it is unlikely (highly, highly, highly unlikely) that I will come CLOSE to filling in the holes in the next 4 days.  Like, I don’t even KNOW what I don’t know.

So…biology.  I actually *have* paid attention to, you know, PEEING.

Pirates and gas

So I have been in a studying cave for the last week, and I intend to continue to be in a studying cave for the next week and a half…so blogging is taking a backseat. 

However, despite the studying cave, DB and I have become mildly obsessed with the Somali pirate story…as DB said this morning, “If they had an entire TV station devoted to pirates, I would never leave our house…”

It’s been a while since we’ve *both* been obsessed with the *same* news story.

And…here is a question for you all…we got this new car in December/January, right?  Well, it has the gas mileage prominantly displayed on the dash – both overall, and at any given instant.  When we were test-driving the thing, the salesperson told me that I drove rather…aggressively.  I kind of brushed it off.

Well, the stupid gas mileage summarizer-thingy would apparently agree with him, and DB has pointed it out to me on multiple (MULTIPLE) occasions.  My gas mileage is, like, MANY miles/gallon worse than DB’s.

Apparently I am like the world’s most wasteful driver.

So recently I have decided to embark on a campaign to reform my driving habits.  I know, I know, I tried hypermiling over the summer, too, and I was a dismal failure (too lazy to find those posts now, but suffice it to say, it was a dismal failure for both MY mileage and the presumed safety of everyone else on the road) – but this isn’t hypermiling, this is simply not driving sub-20 mpg when the car is rated at 25 mpg in the city.  (Or something in that ballpark.) 

Any ideas?  I *think* it is tied to my gear-shifting habits (this is a stick-shift car).  Until, um, yesterday? – I started the car – ALWAYS – in second gear.  First was just such a PITA.  But then I started noticing that I burned a lot of gas starting in second, so back to first.

But…contrary to what you might think given the first/second observation, DRIVING in a lower gear seems to blow through gas.  So cruising through the city in 3rd is WAY more wasteful than shifting to 4th or 5th.  (Which makes no sense to me, because on that token, starting in 2nd should be awesome for mileage, no?)

So…any ideas?  And I do not want to google this, so really, these are ideas that can fit into a small comment box…

I am determined to beat DB somehow.  The gas mileage is going to magically become amazing.  Ha.

Better safe than sorry…

Ok, this is more under the category of “things that can save your DOG’S life…” but close enough.

Last night, after I went to bed, Little started retching, like coughing/trying to throw up without producing anything.  I thought he was actually puking, so I woke up to clean it up – but found that he was just gagging.  Over, and over, and over.  And he had drooled all over the couch (and he doesn’t drool).

And he would stand up, retch, lay down, retch, stand up, retch…

So I decided to Google “dog retching”.  Which turned up several websites, all of which told me that retching unproductively was the number one sign of bloat (or gastric torsion) in large, deep-chested dogs.

Awesome.

Now, I will say, by this time, Little had *stopped* retching.  And, in fact, he was acting ABSOLUTELY FINE.

But then I found this site, which described how a dog had the SAME SYMPTOMS, and was happy and “wagging her tail”, who then DIED on the operating table.

If the intention of that website is to scare the living daylights out of its readers, well…it succeeded.

Little and I were off to the emergency vet.

(Thankfully, we live about 10 minutes from one, so this wasn’t nearly the big deal that it could have been at 2:00 am.)

And now…here is my second piece of lifesaving advice (for Fido…)

The vet said that about an hour before we arrived last night, another dog had come in, dead on arrival, because his owners didn’t know that retching unproductively was a sign of bloat.  They thought they’d let him wait it out, and by the time he stomach got the characteristic “bloat”, it was too late.

So if your deep-chested dog is exhibiting retching, drooling, or any of the other symptoms listed on that link – take the dog in.  It is a really easy diagnostic process.  If it is bloat, and it goes untreated, it is fatal.

Our happy ending:  $200 later…Little is absolutely, perfectly, totally fine.  He loved the X-ray machine and apparently loved having sandbags placed on him (to hold him still for the X-ray) and thought it was a great field trip at 2:00 am.  His stomach was totally fine, his other organs were in the right place (I wasn’t really worried about that, but she kindly highlighted it for me anyway )…but hey, better safe than sorry, right?

Right.

(Although I do wish it hadn’t cost $200.)

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