I am really dumb.  I’ve done this a few times now – I never comment on anyone’s blogs, and then I feel compelled to both comment on some AND write a really whiny post on mine, so that anyone who decides to find out who wrote the (probably dumb) comment clicks here and finds…pathetic me.  So I’m going to spend the next few minutes re-framing.

Yes, the last post was quite a rant.  There is a (vocal) (potent) minority of students in this class who are obnoxious, entitled, bratty, immature, kids.  There is not much more to say about that. 

I am a little weary of learning…well, anything.  I’ve been in non-stop classes (no break whatsoever) since March, when we had a spring break (but I still spent a good chunk of “spring break” studying).  The last time I left this town was for 2 days to watch my brother’s rowing race, and then I jetted back here to study some more.  In the spring, my doctoral-level classes overlapped my freshman summer gen chem, and then gen chem overlapped orgo (by a week). 

DB got back from being in a war zone two weeks ago, but otherwise, that entire time was spent in isolation from the rest of the world, basically, except for my forays into the dog park (which are, admittedly, social events) and my ride to summer gen chem (which was really fun!  I miss hanging out with that person daily now!). 

And, as I mentioned, I haven’t seen DB much since he got back.  We finally went out on a “date” on Monday night – we saw a movie, which was really, really fun.  We ate overpriced and totally unhealthy movie food, too, which resulted in DB having a tummy ache the next day (I guess hot dogs and funnel cake aren’t nutritious?).  (My stomach, hardened by my months of bachelorette eating, was unaffected.  Of course.)

The sum of these events have basically left me really, really, really tired, although I honestly didn’t notice until…well, honestly, until those girls started playing their little hand games!  Because seriously, who DOES that? 

And…I’m about to head to night lab, where my lab partner basically lives to make me feel stupid.  It isn’t hard, mostly because this is basically my second science class since my sophomore year of high school (not kidding) and although I study A LOT – even for LAB – she *always* knows more.  That wouldn’t be a problem, except that she *always* wants to make sure I know that she knows more.  (Mission accomplished.  I get it.  I’m dumb.)

And…it’s not that I think I’m old, but it’s more that I see what my peers are doing (having babies and making lots of money, and no that is not really the thing, but it does make me feel a little useless…) and I feel really…inept.  Which is stupid.  (And I work, too, in case you all are wondering.  Even with this class.  I am actually pretty proud of the fact that I have managed to sustain these two jobs with this class, since I struggle with it so.)

But that doesn’t diminish the facts:  I honestly still feel truly blessed, and I feel really terrible for not being clearer about that earlier.  We are blessed.  DB is safely home.  I have the privilege of taking this class, seemingly intolerable though it may be today (it’s usually not this bad!).  We have wonderful family and friends and, since we work for the gov’t, we are not nearly as affected by a miserable economy as we could be.  We are truly, truly blessed, and those are just the things I could think of right this moment (since lab started one minute ago).

That’s all I wanted to say.  I hope that came across better than the last rant.  Have a blessed evening!

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