Since I have classes every night of the week until late, DB and I rarely see each other for more than 15 minutes a day before we go to bed. Although this is very sad for both of us, it also means that we communicate by phone and text messages to let the other person know what to do in our absence – like, “don’t give Little a bone tonight – he already had one this morning!” or “I already fed him 2x today – don’t let him fool you!” or “He pooped twice today” (OK, most of these things are about our dog-child, Little. Just imagine the tidbits of amazing communication that will ensue when we have a *real* child…somehow I do not think they’ll be all that different. Well, I don’t plan on feeding my child cow bones, but…anyway. What I DO think will happen is that in the transition of moving from Little to Baby as the sole object of our affection, Little will be victoriously chomping on 5 bones a day, spewing diarrhea, and we will be totally flummoxed as to how THAT happened).

OK, moving on.

The other day, I asked him to take out the A/C, because the birds are seriously. setting. up. camp!!!

Well, when DB came home that day, it was dark outside, and he was a little worried about getting his eyes poked out by an infuriated bird family, so he left it.

…and left it.

…and left it.

(The A/C is still. in. the. window. Although in fairness to DB, he is fighting a disgusting sinus infection and feels like crap.)

I actually can’t *see* the birds through the A/C, but now the cat is obsessed with sitting on the coffee table next to the window and hunting them through the opaque screen. She spends hours doing this. It’s like our new neighbors have incited some sort of primal kitty-instincts in her. (She is the most indoor cat of all indoor cats…no claws, no hunting instinct, no sense of impending doom when the dog gets close…yeah. She is not exactly evolved from a cat standpoint. She definitely would not be DB’s secret self-defense weapon if the birds swarmed in.)

In case you are wondering, yes, this is what my life is these days. Trust me. You’d rather hear this than my explanation of my coursework (undergrad bio and undergrad physics) or what I do all day other than homework (I am the nation’s most informed voter at this point. Sometimes, to get really excited, I watch *Fox* and howl at the TV with Little).

I still have my super part-time home-based job, and I have applied for a few other more stable jobs, but I have to take one more class to get a master’s out of my abandoned doctorate (I call it my “accidental master’s”) and THAT class (from October – December) meets for THREE days a week, up to THREE hours PER DAY, rendering actual full-time (or part-time, frankly) employment very challenging (from a logistical standpoint). However, because I feel like a complete waste of air, I am thinking of getting a short-term retail job (for the sanity and the discount). I’m thinking Ann Taylor (need cute clothes), Pottery Barn (yes! replace couch! PLUS options at PB Kids and West Elm!), or Crate and Barrel (yes! augment home goods!). Or JCrew (yay cute clothes, but pants never fit). Votes? I promise you, my lovely readers, if you know me IRL or talk to me enough – YOU might get to take advantage of my discount.

K, bye.

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